Cognitive Defusion

"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are" (Marilyn Monroe). Oftentimes, more often than not, we perceive ourselves as our negative thoughts. We can intentionally do it or not. These negative thoughts are normal. Thinking of fighting off these thoughts or beating them can be overwhelming in the sense that they will automatically go away after one time of "beating them up." Instead of this mindset, we can use it to defuse them and detach yourself from made-up perceptions of yourself inside your head. Throughout treatment, I have found or been introduced to nine techniques to use that I find helpful when I am being invaded by unhelpful views of myself. 

Cognitive fusion is having the frame of mind that "I am my thoughts, and what I am thinking is true." Some examples of these ideations could be, "I am not as pretty as him/her. I will never succeed in life. My legs are too big. I do not do enough movement for food." A simple example of diffusion is asking yourself, "Are these thoughts helpful? Are they holding me back?" Cognitive defusion allows us to disconnect ourselves from our thoughts so we don’t see everything as black and white. Sounds easier said than done. By practicing this, we can distance ourselves from the thoughts or emotions and just notice them rather than being overcome by them.

External Voice: This technique creates space between you and the thought. Instead of saying, "I am going to fail," reframe it to, "I am having the thought that I am going to fail." This adjustment can show how you are not following your thoughts. 

Name the Story: If all of these feelings were put into a movie titled, "something something story," what would you call it? An example of this would be the, "I Am Going to Fail Story." For me, this helps me see how hard I am being on myself. By putting it in a title, I realize the statements I am making about myself are harsh. 

Type It Out: You can actually do this next technique or imagine yourself doing it. Type out your thoughts on a computer screen, then play with the fonts, colors, formatting, and sizes. For me, this allows me to notice the thoughts I am having, and instead of caving into them, I can turn them into something that seems less "scary." By changing the way I see it in my head, it is less daunting and apparent.

Pop-Up Mind: Imagine your thought is an unhelpful pop-up ad and try to close the tabs. Again, this allows you to notice the thought, but you see that it is harmful or destructive, so try and ignore it.

Passengers on the Bus: Imagine yourself driving a bus, and your thoughts are about annoying or rowdy passengers. Try and keep driving; see if you can focus on driving and get to the destination.

Say It Slowly: Say it over and over in slow motion. After doing this, you can ask yourself, "Is the thought as powerful now as it was before? Is it as painful or uncomfortable?"

Leaves on a Stream: When a thought appears, place it on a leaf and watch it float down the stream. This allows you to watch your thoughts float away. See how it can slowly disappear. 

Thank Your Mind: Say, "Thanks for that brain," in a sarcastic way. When unhelpful thoughts appear, your brain thinks it’s being helpful. Give it that same energy back because, in reality, it is being harmful to you.

Carrying Cards: This is something you can physically do, and I have done it in treatment. Write difficult thoughts out on small cards and carry them around with you. It helps show you that you can carry your history without losing the ability to control your life.

We all identify the thoughts in our minds sometimes as being "factual" instead of realizing the truth. Some of these techniques might seem silly or ineffective, but when we become used to having negative ideations about ourselves, they can become overly controlling and halt us from reaching our fullest potential as human beings. The purpose of cognitive defusion is not to put pressure on yourself to always practice these techniques and get them perfect every time. It is to be aware of the process of your thoughts, and by diving deeper into them, you find things out about yourself that you didn't know and you can problem solve.